#5. Run a Half Marathon >> 13.1 miles

Well...I finally did it.  My goal race came and went and I've been putting off writing this blog entry ever since.  See, running is as much psychological as it is physical.  For 16 weeks, I've been talking myself into and out of being able to run this distance.  For 16 weeks, I've been talking myself into and out of just how quickly I could finish this distance. For 16 weeks, I've been talking myself into and out of whether or not I was a real 'runner'. All the while, hoping praying I would be on the more positive upswing of my thoughts the day of the race. I knew that I was trained.  Heck, I was H4C ready (my training group's name).  But, how would I fare?  Am I too fat to run a half marathon?  Am I dumb for even trying this...8 months after having Ben, still breastfeeding, carrying my extra weight?  Boy oh boy, a person's mind can talk them out of just about anything.

I secretly checked Eric's first half marathon finish time...hey, I am competitive.  My heart sank as I realized I could NOT beat tie come close to his finish time.  I resolved to myself that I wouldn't do as well as Eric had done and tried to take an honest look at myself and my ability.  I'm still carrying extra weight, I've done the bare minimum of training (no core training, except carrying a sweet boy up/down the stairs multiple times a day), every 'long run' is a new distance record for me...so, I believed I would finish somewhere around 2 hours and 45 minutes (that's a 12 minute 35 second average pace).  I would be BEYOND amazed if I were able to finish around 2:30 (that's an 11:27 average pace).  I would be disgusted and consider the race a failure if I finished in 3 hours (13:44 average pace).

I realized, though my training, that I am utterly in love with running in the winter.  My body loves cool/cold weather running.  I run faster, feel more energized, have an all around better time when the temps are cold.  The weather can make or break a race.  This day, I was expecting 50s weather.  The forecast called for slight chances of rain, but not until 9 o'clock.  Geez, with any luck, I'd be done running when it started.  That knowledge led me to choose a tech short sleeve shirt and capri running pants.


Well, turns out...God had a different plan.  One that would test my mental strength more than I knew.  The wind chill was 36 and it was raining/hailing/lightening/thundering.  So much so, that the race was delayed 30 minutes.  25,000 people (yes twenty five THOUSAND) huddled anywhere possible to stay warm/dry.

Finally, the race started and a few of my training friends and I managed to cross the STARTING line 10 minutes after the gun sounded.  The wind was howling (25 mph), everyone was excited, cold, ready!  We were running our goal race.  The last 16 weeks were all about the here and now.  I felt great.  I was not winded. I was not tired.  I was not hungry.  I didn't have to use the bathroom.  I was cold, but warming up.  Our pace was at 11:30 and it felt good.  Somewhere around mile 7 or 8, my knee started feeling like it needed to pop.  It never did pop, but it did give out on my a few times.  I questioned whether I would be able to finish the race.  I decided I would run medic tent to medic tent...pushing myself as far as I could go.  After all, this was the TEST...this was the reason for all of the early mornings, the missed suppers, the ice baths!  I was finishing this race!

At the halfway mark, I realized that if I could keep my pace, I'd finish before 2:30.  Boy, that sent a renewed energy that I could not have bought.  I finished the OKC Half Marathon in 2:28:42 (and yes, those 42 seconds are very important).  I did it.  The girl that had her 3rd baby 8 months prior, the girl that was still breastfeeding that lil guy, the girl that had never run more than 3 miles prior to training had finished her goal race with a time that she thought was not possible.

For me, the hardest part was feeling my toes turn to raisins.  We've never run in rain/puddles before.  There was no way on Earth anyone's feet were staying dry.  Hearing the 'squish squish' every step and feeling them get wrinkly was the hardest, most annoying part of the whole race.

After the race, my knee was on fire and I seriously wondered if I could even walk. I got a quick massage and found Eric and Devin in the crowd, went to the hotel, and savored my ice bath.  I'll find out soon what I did to my knee, if anything...whatever it is, it won't keep me from competing like this again.  I am a runner.  I may not look like it, but there's no denying it.  I'm taking this season off (more likely, just not running as much) so that my sweet Eric can train.  He'll be running the Route 66 Half in November and I can't wait to cheer him on!  I cannot wait for the day we can run our first half together...when Ben can handle the training better.  I miss running.  I miss my friends.  I miss the gear.  I miss pushing myself.  I miss the dedication.  I miss the run.