I am a mom, no wait, an employee, no wait, a wife, no wait....

I remember when the question, 'What do you do?' was simple.  Not that I have memories of anyone asking me that question when I was a child, but I can imagine my response would be something like, 'I annoy my sister' or 'I take naps' or 'What do I do? What do you mean? I don't do anything.'

Time passed...

The answer could have been more detailed, as my life got more detailed.  Blessings for everyone around that I was shy and absolutely not comfortable talking about myself.  So my answer, at that time, would be something like, 'homework' or 'I play volleyball/basketball' or 'What do you mean? I don't do anything.'

Time passed...

Kids were born.  I still worked outside the home.  Thankfully, my employer LOVES family and I was able to take both E and Q to work with me.  I work for a small company, so there was lots of 'help' if I had a conference call or if clients were in the office.  Two grandmother's (one biological, one non-biological?) made my job easier.  When asked, at that point, my answer was more like 'I'm a working mom' or 'I dream of sleep' or 'What do you mean? I do everything!'  I felt like I was burning both ends, but doing a fairly good job.

Time passed...

This year, we added Ben.  I still work (from home).  B, like E and Q, stays at home with me, while I work.  Let me clarify...while I attempt to work.  I live in a larger home than ever before - totally NOT bragging here - I'm saying there's so much more work to put into keeping the house.  I am married to the best man I've ever known (excluding my Papa from that list, of course) and I find myself wanting to be a good wife, too.  So the answer now is more like, 'I am Melissa...I do a lot, but nothing 100% well.'

I'm at a crossroads here.  Do I continue to attempt to be the cookie-baking, lunch-making, note-in-the-backpack-sneaking, quality-time-spending, story-telling momma?  Do I continue to attempt to be the dinner-ready-at-5, laundry-pressing (who am I kidding?), lunch-making, love-note-on-the-mirror-leaving, attentive wife?  Do I continue to attempt to be the 8-5-working, 100%-productive, on-top-of-my-game, save-the-day employee?  Do I even attempt to be all of those things AT ONCE???

Or...do I just be 'Melissa'?  Who happens to be (today anyway) a food-preparing, kisses-before-bed, hugs-anytime, attentive-listener, back-rubber, milk-producer, customer-biller, idea-provider, God-loving, floor-sweeping, Christmas-tree-decorating woman of the not-100%-clean house.  Amen to that.

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